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Topic: Jokes Section: Old Farmer's Advice Table of Contents to this Topic |
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€ Your fences need to be horse-high, pig-tight and bull-strong. € Keep skunks and bankers and lawyers at a distance. € Life is simpler when you plow around the stump. € A bumble bee is considerably faster than a John Deere tractor. € Words that soak into your ears are whispered...not yelled. € Meanness don't jes' happen overnight. € Forgive your enemies. It messes up their heads. € Do not corner something that you know is meaner than you. € It don't take a very big person to carry a grudge. € You cannot unsay a cruel word. € Every path has a few puddles. € When you wallow with pigs, expect to get dirty. € The best sermons are lived, not preached. € Most of the stuff people worry about ain't never gonna happen anyway. € Don't judge folks by their relatives. € Remember that silence is sometimes the best answer. € Live a good, honorable life. Then when you get older and think back, you'll enjoy it a second time. € Don't interfere with somethin' that ain't botherin' you none. € Timing has a lot to do with the outcome of a rain dance. € If you find yourself in a hole, the first thing to do is stop diggin'. € Sometimes you get, and sometimes you get got. € The biggest troublemaker you'll probably ever have to deal with, watches you from the mirror every mornin'. € Always drink upstream from the herd. € Good judgment comes from experience, and a lotta that comes from bad judgment. € Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier than puttin' it back in. € If you get to thinkin' you're a person of some influence, try orderin' somebody else's dog around. € Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God. |
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