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| Sacred Science |
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| John Keely's Sacred Science |
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Topic: Jokes Section: Home Security System Table of Contents to this Topic |
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HOW TO INSTALL A HOME SECURITY SYSTEM 1. Go to a second-hand store and buy a pair of men's used size 14-16 work boots. 2. Place them on your front porch, along with several empty beer cans, a copy of Guns & Ammo magazine and several NRA magazines. 3. Put a few giant dog dishes next to the boots and magazine. 4. Leave a note on your door that reads: "Hey Bubba, Big Jim, Duke and Slim, I went to the gun shop for more ammunition. Back in an hour. Don't mess with the pit bulls --they attacked the mailman this morning and messed him up real bad. I don't think Killer took part in it but it was hard to tell from all the blood. PS - I locked all four of 'em in the house. Better wait outside." |
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